Sunday, May 30, 2010

American Idol

My father asked for three things from me this weekend - dinner for the three nights that he's here. That I can do. To maximize my ability to spend time with people, I invited who I pleased. Well, my brother Dave calls us on Saturday to let us know he's bringing home an American Idol Contestant. Turns out Dave works with a contestant from Season 8. He's friends with Dave's brother-in-law and decided to come sell in Canada. 
Well we're at dinner and immediately begin trying to embarrass our American Idol - Austin Sisneros.
Click Here for his audition. 
Poor Austin. Has to deal with my brother Dave and Stephanie's Jake embarrassing him every two seconds. Through out dinner we tried to convince Austin that he should sing for us. He adamantly refused... until right before we were going to leave. Turns out peer pressure works.
The couple of strangers sitting next to us got more than they bargained for for sure!
He made it to the Top 20 I think.
Cathy, Trent and I brought Austin to a house party. At first no one believed us when Bonnie told them he was an American Idol contestant. But youtube doesnt lie. And neither does his singing (which he got peer pressured into doing again - the girls swooned and the guys stood awkwardly off to the side).
He was quite the party favor. And worked the crowd like a pro! It was hilarious to watch.
He's a super nice kid though. It was fun having him around. 
And how many people can say they've hung out with a contestant of American Idol?

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Inflight Musings

Things I’ve learned while flying:
1.  A slow walker in normal life  
airport me has only 
one pace (thanks to the express 
walkways)  the “I’m passing you
 on the left” pace.
2.       Bringing a blanket on the plane is the BEST idea Ever.
3.       Mid-flight napping takes the 
melodrama edge off and passes time. Double win.
4.       I loves me some salty peanuts.
5.       Getting your perio knowledge on 
is easier since there’s not a 
lot else you can do on a plane.
6.       I love airport bookstores
would contemplate missing my 
flight just so I could peruse its 
shelves (ok, not really but I 
love finding new books).
7.       Cranberry juice is the bombdotcom.
8.       Airports/planes are out 
of control with their cranked AC

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Logan Airport

Every time I fly I start to feel anxious. I'm not melodramatic enough to worry about the plane crashing. That doesnt phase me even slightly. If it crashes, it crashes. Its the checking in and security. Its all those lines and the crowds and crowds of people. The expectation to be on time - and conversely that if you're late your travel plans are completely screwed.
Maybe my anxiety stems from the first time I flew by myself. I got hauled off to be questioned in a room because my parents forgot to write me a permission note and they saw a teenager and went "Oh teenage angst - this ones definitely a runaway". Foolish security people.
But even if I know I couldnt possibly be late, I still worry. I sit in the taxi on the way to the airport, willing it to hurry up. I take one look at the security line and can only see it as a stand still, worrying the whole while that I wont make it through in time. Every minute has me racing against a clock. And every minor setback at the check-in counter sends me reeling.
Maybe I just havent flown enough. Maybe.
The flight back home is usually worse. Because my airport anxiety combines with the irrational fear I have of coming home and everything being different. Of all the expectations - expectations I cant possibly measure up to. That the people I go to visit will be different, that I'm different - and our two differents are an impossible match. I worry that all the effort and class cutting, will reward me with nothing but a slap in the face, that resounds that the life I've held onto in Alberta doesnt exist anymore. And if I were to be perfectly honest with myself, I'd have to admit that my life in Alberta doesnt exist anymore. I'm not real there. I'm a vague memory that is slowly replaced by change. And as much as I initially want to come home, as the time nears I begin to dread it.
Of course I am not changing my plans. Anxiety or not - I do love being home. But its the moment before I get there that I cant stand. This moment (and the next seven hours) in fact.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Enter vlog.

Video blogging friends.
I am a sheep.
And have zero video editing skills.
But I still think vlogs are amazing.
Wanna hear me ramble not just in print form?
Here it is.




And yes... this may happen again.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Perio

"For memories..."

Amit BWW

For Amit's Birthday we went to Connecticut for wings.
It was a two hour drive. Basically for wings.
Slightly ridiculous.
We beat Amit there and started to play trivia.

All we wanted to do was beat Flea. He lives for trivia tho. 
We decided to be HI AMIT.
Cause we're awesome.
It was a fun little outing tho.

(seth&kirsten, me, dee, mel&derrick, amit, heather, liz)
And yes, I've become one of those people who travels with a book at all times.

Happy Birthday last week Amit!

Venti Grand

You know what I think is really annoying. When I speak to people and they will either only talk about the fact that I'm from Canada or doing dental. Like those are the only two things that they've chosen to remember about me and as such they assume those are the only two things that I could possibly care to talk about. Its actually really annoying to have people only talk to me about dental related issues. And almost comical the simple things that people dont know - like FYI gingivitis is inflammation of your gums. Ya know... the pink stuff that surrounds your teeth. And ridiculous because I do not feel qualified to have people asking me about the lesions they've noticed in their mouth. Um ya - the answer is go to a certified dentist ya fool. I think the reason it irritates me so much that people only talk to me about Canada or dental school, is that it makes me seem so one dimensional. I am bored the second the conversation begins. And it makes me realize that I have nothing in common with these people. Why do I try to be friends with people that clearly I was not meant to be friends with? We cant even get past the small talk stage of things... I loathe small talk. If we cant get past that stage we were most definitely not meant to be friends. Or even acquaintances... Cause I would rather not pretend to be close to people that I could care less about. And every conversation feels like a repeat of the conversation before. I would rather sit in silence than listen to the drivel that comes out of their mouths. And really... I know I'm making a big deal out of nothing. Its not that they're terrible people. I'm sure they're well liked. Its just not for me. I find every minute tedious. And I know that makes me terribly unkind but the second I arrive I wish I had already left. I guess a big thing for me is how people speak to me. And this manner - oh it is wretched. Also.. really love when someone tells me they drove through Alberta once and then proceeds to tell me I am sorely mistaken about the fact that Dawson's Creek isnt in Lethbridge. And then gripes about what an awful profession dentistry is - and when she finds out I'm in dental school - goes "Well its true." Mmk bitch - I hope to never be within two feet of you again. Wait.. make that 30. The gut reaction to punch your skinny ace was pretty strong.
And I feel envious. Envious because - out of the two years that I've been in Massachusetts I havent been able to convince a single person - other than my parents (whom I adore for their willingness to come) to visit me. Mel and Derrick have a near constant stream of friends who want to visit. And I'm filled with jealousy that Mel has managed to stay so close with friends. Friends who want to see her in a tangible way. And its not that I have a lot of time to entertain someone. In fact I have none. Which I suppose is why my parents are the perfect people to come. Because they dont care if they spend the entire time watching tv while I study. They're just happy to be with me. But my envy has more to do with the gesture of it all. More to do with the fact that my closest friends cant be bothered to make an effort - not unless it has some personal perk for themselves. And I am no perk. And I suppose thats my fault. And that I should just be happy that they still speak to me. But we only see each other when I make the effort and fly home. Cause yes... coming home is an effort. I love being home, but its stressful. Because I feel like I need to make everybody happy. Because I love being home but I hate it too. And would we even see each other if I didnt come home? I dont really know the answer to that. I just get sick of hearing - come to edmonton, come to where I am. How about for once you come where I am? And I know, in my head, that friendship is more than just seeing each other. But sometimes it feels like I just dont matter.
And I know I'm being whiney. But I feel misunderstood. I cut my hair again. Because I couldnt stand how it looked any longer. But I'm not sure the haircut helped with the healthy dose of self-loathing I have going on. In fact it is most definitely worse.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Class Paint

Anybody who knows me well, knows that I get nervous to try new things.
Doesnt matter if I know in the end I'll like it. The thought of those awkward
few moments of not knowing what to do and looking stupid generally have
me avoiding new situations. I need a friend to be there and tell me to be brave.
Ironic that for such a little risk-taker - I'm also a total wuss.
So when our class decided to go paintballing, I immediately deleted the email.
Paintballing is intimidating. With their guns and masks - and for heavens sake, I had no idea what to wear. It just was easier to decide I'd rather spend a quiet day at home, than to face a rush of insecurity.
It's probably for the best that I have such an active crew who love to try new things. Cause left on my own I most definitely would not have gone. But when Dee mentioned she was interested in going and then decided she was definitely going - I put my anxiety aside and agreed to go. And since I made plans with Dee, Amit and Seth, I couldnt back out when I started to panic.
And I'm glad I didnt. We didnt stay till the end (cause we were going to Connecticut for wings for Amit's birthday) but I had a lot of fun. I dont know why I let my little anxieties erase my memories of how much I like doing fun activities. I even got Amit to mercy surrender to me! It was a great morning.
(Me, Amit, Adam Garaas, Seth, Dee)

Seriously. How Bad A are we?

Answer: Not nearly as intimidating as the twelve year old with his automatic
paint ball gun, who warmed up with his finger roll triggering and aiming at us.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Letters

Dear Remo -
Today I didnt completely hate you... For the first time.
Even tho it was super contrived when the final slides of 
twenty things we absolutely need to know were that our 
insane teacher is retiring and will miss us greatly. And 
even tho it was super trite when our class felt obligated to 
stand at the end of the lecture and clap (clap for joy she's
leaving). Even tho crazy lady was extra crazy today (insert
mention of having sex for the first time and crazy shrieky 
explanations) and I was confined in a small group with her...
today was a good day. I laughed more than I gritted my teeth.
I felt like myself. And there was a parade for how awesome
I was at partial denture designs. John was there. He saw it.

Dear Saddlebags -
Thanks for being so bump-bumping.
I'm trying to be a runner. So if you could
take a hike that would be great.
Cause p.s. I hate you.

Dear Running -                 .    .  .
Sorry for being so stop and go today.   .
And for that short stop that lead me into
the arms of Anthro. I'll try to be less    . 
ridiculous tomorrow.                              .

Dear Self -
You're doing good. Keep it up.
Positivity.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

MM-TPT

Sometimes the married mormons are hilarious to me. This is a story of such hilarity. It was once under a  ban... but the ban is broken baby! 

One Friday night I get a text at 11pm from Derrick saying "Hey wanna go TP Brad's house?"
I, of course, am all for mischief. So I text back and Derrick and John show up minutes later to get me. We laugh and chat about various teenage shenanigans and eventually I ask where this little idea came from... Apparently Mel mentioned she felt like toilet papering someone to Derrick - who of course ran with the idea and invited John along for the ride. John, knowing my love of fun, knew I'd want in on this and invited me along. And I of course brought my camera.  

First stop for us... we needed supplies... 
Picking the perfect TPing toilet paper can be a challenge in itself.
Good thing Derrick and John are no amateurs at this.

As we drove to Brad and Deidre's we unravelled toilet paper... to make for a more efficient toilet papering of course. I was the lucky child who got to sit with all the toilet paper.

FYI... 12 pack of TP is alot.

Derrick's favorite part of unravelling?
When he finished a roll and got to whip it behind himself at me.


All was quiet outside the Cammack abode when we arrived.

So we went to work.

I wish I had gotten a finished product pic... cause it was pretty good. But the boys heard someone coming and we all booked it away. I was sworn to secrecy - with the promise that I would not blog about the events of this night - until we told Brad and Deidre it was us.

But a week ago Derrick could no longer hold it in...
And I was greeted on facebook with this...
 Derrick told Brad and Deidre at the temple. 
I would like to wish Brad and Deidre luck on their search for retribution. 
Cause none of us have TP accessible houses.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

G-time.

I've decided to make some goals for the month of May...
- running... oh how I wish that instead of thinking about running for an hour or two every night and debating it, that I'd just go for a run... I'm getting fat (and FYI this isnt a pity statement... but one of honesty - if you need physical proof you can suck it)... It actually breaks my heart a little bit because when I was in Alberta I felt so great about my physical shape and how I looked. And now... its a sorry state of affairs. One that has me hating having to get dressed. I want to feel good about what I look like. And I dont. Not even a little bit. So my goal is to run every weekday at least for a half hour.
- pilates... now I've been doing pilates but I dont want it to slide with the added addition of running... so my goal for that is to continue...
- studying... I've got some major testing coming up... as such my priorities need to be focused on preparing for that. My dad gave me a nice little speech about how I just need to buckle down and work hard for the next two and a half months - and sure some things like blogging may not happen as frequently - but that my priorities need to be on school. Well I heard ya dad. Less blogging - more studying. 
- classes... and speaking of school... I really want to try to attend all my classes and pay attention. 
- sleeping... I've really been trying to be a more regular sleeper... but even still... stress mounts and sleeping gets tough... but I'm gonna try to be ready to sleep by midnight.
- scripture study... my ward set the goal to read the New Testament... which clearly I'm not finishing in the month of May... but I want to at least participate... so daily NT time.
- healthy eating.. I've recently been trying to give up candy. which anyone whose met me knows this is hard... cause candy is my cigarettes. to ween myself off of straight candy I went to baked good... to ween myself off baked goods I went to fruit... 

So the month of may should look like this...
Studying
Attending class
Pilates
Running
Scripture studying
Sleeping Regularly
Healthy Eating

The idea is balance. Which is apparently the only idea I ever have.