I Went To Utah

I've never really travelled any place other than my home. Not without my parents that is. I've never bought a plane ticket, just so I could visit someone. I've never even thought of taking a mini-vacation from school that wasnt Christmas vacation or Summer vacation. So going to Utah for a long weekend was a big deal for me. It was out of the ordinary. It was out of character for me, who has never been willing to fit in irrational and impromptu trips into my always busy school schedule. But building up anything in your mind, always leads to a slight let-down. Not cause it wasnt great in its own way. But because its always different from how you picture it in your mind. Reality is always different from fantasy. And thats not necessarily bad. But it is different and with that difference needs to come a level of acceptance. Accepting that things dont turn out how you expect. Lately, I've been feeling this very lofty feeling that my experiences (and certain let-downs) are making me into a better person. I was at the gym, running on a treadmill, and suddenly I could see my disappointments from a much more grandiose perspective. They have made me kinder, more understanding - softer. They absolutely were disappointing. Hence being "disappointment". But for that moment, as I let my thoughts run free, I felt a certain growth that hadnt been there a moment before. Sure, it means that my hard edges have been worn down a bit, leaving me more exposed; there's always a trade-off with change. But this last week, I was grateful for that empathy I have developed. I was grateful for the fact that I'm not so stupid stubborn about everything. I absolutely am willing to let someone change my opinion. And even if they dont, I am willing to see the value their opinion holds. I'm not perfect. But its unrealistic to expect that I would be anything but a work in progress. I think there are many different truths in this life. And sometimes you find them in unlikely places - and not everyone need hold the same truths tight. Our experiences shape everything about us. And being different and valuing different things isnt wrong - it makes us individual.

But Utah. The highlights:

1. It really is beautiful there. Those mountains always looming close, make it feel safe and majestic there. And I wish I had taken a picture. But it was one of those weekends where my camera was too shy to come out. 

2. The Carl Bloch exhibit. 

These are my two favorite paintings. They are beautiful to me deep down. 

3. Zupas

Seriously who knew that a place this delicious existed. I'm actually offended (but not really) 

that I hadnt known about it before. It was good enough that 

I wished it had been a part of my life before that moment. 

I went three or four times. 

And it was amazing each time.

4. Sweethearts. 

I met a lovely BYU couple.

They were barely 18/19.

But they were funny, easygoing and hopeful.

And the little I knew about them, made me envious.

I shared with them how fun Rook can be.

And they shared Sweetheart candy with me.

Upon discovering that I'm a kindred soul in candy preferences,

they got me a few boxes to take on the plane back to Boston.

It was terribly thoughtful.

And made me even sadder to leave.

Because for a moment, I wished I was staying.

They have a constant stream of people who 

just stop by to hang out and do homework.

And I wished that I could 

play cards and become a friend who just dropped in too.

4. Even though I didnt see a ton of them, I was happy for

the family I have in Utah.

I enjoyed our little conversations.

And that they were so willing to let me roam as I pleased.

5. I am number four.

I went and saw this opening night.

And while, it did differ from the book (which I recommend people read),

the differences werent bad.

And I really enjoyed the movie.

5. Peyton Sevy

This is my cousin Brit's daughter.

So my cousin once removed I think.

But this child is completely darling.

She set up a pajama party and made us all place settings.

We limboed and played UNO attack.

And she dominated both.

We played a lovely version of soccer where I dominated.

She's a funny little child.

And I like her very much.

6. My favorite moments werent anything big or grand.

They were the moments where I was just sitting

and listening to a guitar or someone talking.

They almost felt routine and like life would continue

on that way forever.

And it was the simplicity of 

those moments that made them lovely.