Not Thinking About It

You know when someone tells you not to think of something... and then that is the only thing you can think of? Ya... totally having that problem. Except I'm the one who told myself not to think about it. Freaking day.

Well what I'm thinking about is someone I used to know. And I was perfectly happy letting this person slide into that whole arena of the past... but I think I'm being haunted. Horrible how that happens sometimes. So I'm not thinking about it.

And thats working out... well... not that well.

So to distract myself I'm blogging. Woot.

But it is kinda amazing to me how people can change so quickly. I was reading the BOM yesternite about the conversion of the Anti-Nephi-Lehies... and well... once they were on board... they were ONBOARD. Like nothing was gonna get them to renounce what they knew to be true. Not people with swords, slicing and dicing. Its freaking amazing when you think about.

Anyways on the line of change... It seems like small little decisions lead to all the changes you make. Because one small decision after another and suddenly you look up and you are far from where you started. And that can go good... or not so good.

I feel like when I look back at the seventeen year old version of myself...

I kinda am amazed by some of the differences. At least I feel like I'm different. I hope that I'm smarter. Maybe a little wiser... and I think a little kinder. Life has a way of slowly changing you... Or sometimes doing it real fast and painful like. But change it does. And things that I didnt think were all that important back then now are... And ya know that old saying that you turn into your parents... I totally think it might be true. I kinda forced my mom into reading me some of her old journal entries from before she was married... and the way she wrote things. I swear I have very similar entries in my own journals. It was weird to hear. And well, turning out like my dad. Brilliant, successful, loyal ... loves his job... I think I could handle that too. The weirdest part is is that as a seventeen-year old I thought I was nothing like my parents. And now I find out that I'm kinda similar in a freaky friday kinda way. But I dont mind. I wouldnt have it any other way.